Miguel Almiron is Newcastle United’s very own Ugly Duckling - much to Jack Grealish’s embarrassment

Words have a funny way of coming back to bite you. Whether you’re a shock jock football pundit with opinions spilling out the wazoo or a free market conservative given the keys to the country’s economy, even your firmest beliefs and most concretely-stated predictions have a happy knack of tripping you up when you least expect it.

Back in May, Jack Grealish, he of encyclopedic confusion and calves that most dairy farmers would die for, got a bit drunk on a bus. We’ve all been there. The difference, of course, is that most of us haven’t been three sheets to the wind on a double decker with Pep Guardiola and the Premier League trophy. In the ensuing revelry, Grealish cut about the place like a naughty child at a family function, ricocheting from mischief to mischief, all the while buoyed by an endearing temerity and sporting a pair of shades that made him look like one of the Three Blind Mice from Shrek.

Fitting then, that it was a stunning lack of foresight from the City himbo that had Newcastle United fans sharpening their carving knives. In one errant stint on a live mic, Grealish quipped that teammate Riyad Mahrez deserved to be subbed during the champions’ final game of the season because he, quote, “played like Almiron.” The prevailing sentiment from the Toon Army was something along the lines of “What did poor little Miggy ever do to you?”.

Now, in fairness to Grealish, while his comment did have the unnecessarily cruel demeanour of a schoolyard bully picking his next victim at random, the Paraguayan hadn’t shown a great deal in the English game to suggest that the assessment was wholly wide of the mark. Or rather, he hadn’t yet.

Since Grealish’s unprovoked kidney punch, Almiron has emerged from a chrysalis of criticism (a chrysalisitism?) transformed. Suddenly, without so much as an ounce of foreshadowing or the faintest whisper of an explanation, the South American has become one of the best players in the Premier League.

How long it will last, who can say? But at this precise moment in time, Miguel Angel Almiron Rejala looks like a man possessed. The 28-year-old has always been a thoroughly likeable figure. His constant beam and indefatigable spirit bring to mind a kind of lesser-spotted, largely-forgotten Sonic the Hedgehog companion sidekick. Miggy the Magpie does have a nice ring to it. But now, the spritely scamp has added a serrated edge to his game too.

Almiron is averaging a goal every other outing this season, with six already to his name. (Just as a point of reference, not that it really matters, Grealish has found the net only the once.) These have been no ordinary strikes either. The midfielder’s first against Fulham boasted shades of Van Basten, his winner against Tottenham was jinking, incisive, cute. In a quite remarkable turn of events, the Paraguayan has gone from wallflower to blooming bouqet. He is Eddie Howe’s very own Ugly Duckling.

In truth, Almiron will probably care little about Grealish’s comments. The notion that the City star’s takedown acted in any way as a catalyst for his counterpart’s metamorphisis is a fairly risible one. Perhaps then, the lesson instead is that we should be careful of who we poke fun, because they might just go on to shock us further down the line. With that in mind, I await Jack Grealish’s exquisitely verbose rebuttal nervously.